Masculinity… People seem to know it, when they see it. They sense it, they react to it, but if you ask most men to define masculinity, you get a lot of confused and conflicted answers. In many cases you get a short lecture on morality, tradition, and the popular conception of manhood.
-Rena Stephanus
From ancient time men have been separated from women and associated with qualities which are strong, courageous, protective, confidence, hardworking, honorable and brave among others. As well as guiding behaviors of aggression, risk taking, emotionless and stern. Men were chosen on the basis of their physical strength and expression of these qualities to partake in war. To protect the perimeter of their tribe/family, their possession and if necessary go out to and take what the tribe/family needed and wanted.
The qualities associated with men can be drawn back to how we raise our children. The simple “men don’t cry, men are brave and hardworking and anything contrary to this makes you soft, weak and a moffie” has ripped away the sense of vulnerability in men. Masculinity has become an idol that most men want to reflect and be as perfect. The example of manhood is often derived from our fathers, uncle’s, grandparents or any male figure of substance.
This idol often stares men in the face, it proves to most that being a man isn’t as easy, and many fall short of this definition; making them feel out casted by society. We often find sayings projected by women, on the basis of men’s physical appearance how they are not man enough, on the reflection of their materials how they aren’t providers and hardworking enough or the fact that they are beat by women; making them “weak and vulnerable”.
But the question still stand does masculinity still play a vital role in society? And could it be that masculinity isn’t the guideline to being a man anymore? We live in a society where you define yourself according to your own interest.
Qualities of manhood and guiding behavior is a metaphoric map, one we need to establish in order to fit into the territory we are running off. Possibly the time to redefine masculinity is now, without putting men in a box that neither suffocates them nor dilutes these traditional qualities.
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