Look at God!

It is the year 2020! 

Compliments for the New Year.

May it be a decade filled with love, peace and everlasting hope.

The whole catch phrase out there, describing 2020 as 20Plenty, is for sure growing on me.

Speak it into existence baby.

Most of us are back at work or well on our way to get ready to be back at work.

Whilst some of us, are getting ready to go on that long anticipated holiday.

Some of us might have a long list of to do’s. 

I definitely do.

Something refreshing about a New Year. 

I am not big on New Year’s Resolutions, however I am big on GOALS.

And I am bigger on words.

I have unanimously decided that my word for 2020 will be: LESS.

Less sugar, (the devil)

Less unhealthy choices, both physically and mentally,

Less negativity,

Less Social Media/Screen Time,

Less forced relations or forced conversations,

Less noise,

Less impatience,

Less overthinking and overanalysing,

Less explaining myself,

And definitely LESS  living like a superwoman that can do everything all by herself.

And mysteriously as if the stars were aligned to my wish I had the following experience that humbled me.

On Family Day 26th of December 2019, I took my son on an outing.

The wind blew terribly and we couldn’t stay out later than anticipated, however, later the evening I developed some ear situation.

I brushed it off, but it persisted and I was in total pain and discomfort.

Long story short.

Ever since the 28th of December 2019 until last week, I have seen three different doctors and I have been on antibiotics for three weeks already, to fight this terrible ‘’apparent’’ middle ear infection. My hair and nails are suffering the most.

Eventually, my GP whom I have so much faith in and who has been on leave thus the other two Dr visits, advised that I have a perforated ear drum. In plain English:  My ear drum is ruptured at this point of my life and I have lost hearing to my one ear.

I cannot begin to explain to you the discomfort, the pain, the sleepless nights I am experiencing up to now.

My doctor reckons, there is hope that it might heal, however, the possibility of permanently losing my hearing in the one ear is also there and I need to keep an open mind to this. I will be in and out of Doctor’s offices by next week, for the final verdict.

Yeah, I did look up to the sky more than once, and said, “God, really?”. Especially after having to ask my son to repeat himself, since I did not hear him the first time around. So, what does this have to do with what I want to tell you today?

Experts reckon that the road one needs to travel to reach happiness, is the road to thankfulness.

Instead of pursuing happiness, we ought to be chasing thankfulness. 

It is a colossal battle to be truly happy with one’s circumstances, and how does one still appreciate it, when it is not what you have hoped or prayed for? I definitely did not pray to loose partial hearing to my one ear.

Contentment, the word stands like an enemy against true ambition. Ambition is hope, hope that if one works hard and try your best, things will be better.

It comes with the shimmering hope that, one will be able to have, do, see, experience, achieve and demand more.

We live in the digital era, an era that can be described as the era of comparison. 

How is an attitude of gratitude promising when you are constantly bombarded with everything that you are not, don’t have and never will be?

How is it possible to wish things were not different?

Perhaps, gratefulness isn’t a lack of ambition at all.

Perhaps, it’s the awareness of one’s privilege.

We are allowed to strive for more but we should acknowledge the fact that what we have now, is perhaps something someone else is dreaming about.

Or what you have dreamed about at some point in your life.

Life is a magnificent thing, and I believe that everything will be okay, and if this hearing loss is sent by God, for me to listen, Well God, you  got all my attention, I am listening!


‘’Curvy Scorpio Love’’


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